Each year, I enjoy looking back on the year that is coming to an end, scrolling through the hundreds of photos I took on my phone, putting the final touches on a Shutterfly photo album, and looking over my calendar and planner taking note of all the things that filled it while starting my new one. What I've learned over the years is that we can't look forward without first looking back. We can't plan the following year without spending a little time reviewing the year that is coming to an end. We can't make improvements if we fail to learn and grow, edit and change.
2020 was interesting to say the least. I've heard a lot of people on social media talk about holding loss and disappointment (or pain and grief) in one hand while simultaneously holding joy and hope in the other, and that's exactly how I felt about 2020. It was filled with frustrating change, tremendous loss and disappointment, unmet expectations, so much sadness, challenge and loads of uncertainty. It was a bit of a dumpster fire that started with the tragic loss of Kobe Bryant, and then a global pandemic that would go on for the entire year and beyond, sickness and loss of life, cancelled events including much anticipated graduations and weddings, lost jobs and businesses, masks and social distancing, quarantines and travel restrictions, empty shelves, break-ups and divorces, one natural disaster after another, racial injustices, riots and protests, political agendas and sadly the division of our country in so many ways. Wow... what a year. And in many ways, it's unfortunately far from over.
Thankfully my family did not suffer tremendous loss like some did, but we missed out on watching my husband graduate with his doctorate degree after 6 long years of hard work and sacrifice. Instead, his graduation was done virtually (as in his name popping up on a screen during a video posted on social media) and a box eventually arrived at our doorstep with his diploma, tassel, and program in it. It was disappointing. As a healthcare provider and a principal working through a pandemic, it was both challenging and emotionally exhausting sometimes. Working against the strong opinions of others, trying to do what was right, learning on the fly, it often felt confusing and frustrating. Not only was work stressful, but we also experienced a loss of church and community, as well as a loss of our normal rhythms and routines and so many anticipated plans on our calendar.
But 2020 was also good if we were looking for the silver linings, and I definitely chose to do so. It was a year that brought families together like never before as there was suddenly more time at home with quiet evenings for neighborhood walks and chats. People found simple joys in baking, putting puzzles together, riding bikes, doing home improvement projects, organizing their home, crafting, watching old movies, and reading books. Creative outlets provided a much-needed distraction in the midst of the chaos. New puppies and babies were brought into homes. Businesses found themselves pivoting into new directions in order to stay afloat, everything went virtual including school, meetings, and even doctor's appointments. Goals were reevaluated and people started focusing on the things that truly mattered. Communities rallied together in unique ways like sewing masks for healthcare workers. We learned how to walk through 2020 with purpose over fear, to face each day with courage and grace, kindness and resilience, and to focus on the things that we could control like our attitude and our mindset. Healthcare workers, educators, and other essential workers chose to bravely show up each and every day with a smile behind our mask and a willingness to keep going.
As I look back on 2020, I will definitely remember Covid 19 and the health and economic crisis it caused, the masks and social distancing, all the change and division, disappointment and loss, but I will also remember the good and all the joy that we chose to create amidst the chaos of a dumpster fire year. I published my first book and wrote another, giving me a way to therapeutically cope with the craziness all around me. I ran my 3rd marathon for my 40th birthday with my husband and girls cheering me on, just a month before the pandemic hit. We celebrated my husband's huge accomplishment of finishing his doctorate degree with a fish fry, cake, and fireworks at my older brother's house even though we never got to experience his moment on stage. We saw the Grand Canyon with our girls, went on our 11th annual beach trip with friends despite the fear of Covid, and we took pictures in front of Mount Rushmore during an election year like no other. We will remember decorating my husband's new office at a brand-new middle school as he tirelessly prepared for return to school in the middle of the pandemic. We will remember church at the football stadium, Covid-style birthday celebrations, chalked-up driveways and painted up windows around town to encourage others. We will remember getting a hamster to bring joy to our home, purple and turquoise hair tips during the longest spring break ever, chats with our neighbors as a our dogs played together, fun projects around the house, summer camp that looked much different but was still just as impactful, and we will remember fishing at the creek and making special memories with our kids during quarantine. I will also remember getting the Covid-19 vaccine with fellow healthcare workers 3 days before Christmas, listening to Silent Night on my way home, with tears streaming down my face as I finally felt like this pandemic might soon come to an end.
2020 was such a teachable year. Would we simply survive or find a way to thrive through all the change and disappointment? Would we choose anger or love? Fear or courage? Negativity or positivity? Would we turn away from the church as buildings were forced to close their doors, or would we be the church? Would we spend the year wishing everything was "normal" or would we find a way to cultivate peace, joy, and purpose in the midst of the craziness and disappointment?
In my new book, Fill up to Spill out, Because we can't pour from an empty cup, I write about all the ways I fill my cup in order to love and serve others as the best version of myself. I focus on the things that matter the most like protecting my peace, cultivating joy, filling my own cup each day, and finding the good even in a hard season. Written during the global pandemic, I share my personal journey, unique perspective, and lessons learning in real time as I navigated life in 2020. It's available on Amazon if you'd like to grab a copy or read the Kindle edition.
As we reflect on 2020 and all the lessons learned during a tough season, I pray that we can look ahead to 2021 with hope and a positive mindset, focusing on what truly matters - faith in God, our family and friends, and our purpose while here on this Earth. There is still goodness all around us.
Wishing you peace and joy as you end 2020 and look forward to the New Year!
~ Allison
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